Alright folks, gather ’round. Today’s mess, I mean, project: trying to put down some solid wood flooring for my little backyard volleyball pit that wouldn’t rattle your teeth out when you dive. Shock absorbing, see? Sounds simple. It absolutely wasn’t.

Getting Bamboozled by Wood and Foam

First, I dragged myself down to the big hardware store. Walked straight to the fancy wood aisle. Wanted that solid, good-looking wood floor stuff, the kind that lasts. Grabbed a bunch of those thick tongue-and-groove planks. Heavy buggers. Loaded up the truck, groaning the whole way.

Figured for the bouncy part underneath? People online talked about rubber pads. Okay. Found these thick foam squares, looked like giant yoga mats. Sales guy swore they’d soak up the jumps. Bought a stack taller than my kid. Confidence level: sky high. Dumb.

Laying Down the “Easy” Part

Got home, cleared the spot where the sand usually lives. Swept it clean, tried to make it level with a shovel and a long board. Called it “good enough.” Started rolling out those foam mats. Shoulda been click-clack, easy puzzle, right?

But NO.

The ground wasn’t perfectly flat (shock!). Foam squares wrinkled up like my shirt after work. Corners buckled. Edges refused to sit tight. Sweating buckets trying to wrestle the damn things flat. Ended up taping them together with heavy-duty duct tape like wrapping a busted present. Looked awful. Felt worse. Already questioning my life choices.

The Wood Floor Battle Begins

Okay, time for the nice wood part. Surely this would be straightforward. Took the first plank. Heavy! Slotted the tongue into the groove of the starter strip I nailed down (took 3 tries to get it remotely straight). Felt smug for a second.

Then wham! Second plank. Groove splits. Wood cracks near the end. Probably hammered too hard? Maybe the wood was thirsty? No clue. Swore a blue streak. Grabbed another plank. More careful this time. Tap-tap-tap. Goes together… okay. But now it’s sticking up over the foam edge. Like a seesaw.

Realized the foam wasn’t just wrinkly; it was squishing way more under the wood weight than I thought. The whole thing felt wobbly, like walking on a waterbed covered in boards. Jumped on it. Heard a horrible crunching sound. Foam under the edges? Compressing to nothing. Heart sank. This was useless.

Pulling My Hair Out and Plan B

Sat on my busted flooring, sipping terrible coffee. This bouncy dream was dead. Threw the fancy foam idea straight in the bin. What actually handles squishing? Went back to the garage. Saw that leftover carpet padding stuff from when I redid the basement – thicker than felt, spongy. “What the hell,” I thought.

Ripped out the ruined foam mats (more duct tape carnage). Laid the thick carpet padding down over the whole area. Heavy plywood sheets went on top of that, screwed down tight. Nowhere near as pretty, but stable? Yes. Then finally, carefully, laid those heavy wood planks right on the plywood. Glued them down properly. No more tap-tap-tap madness.

The “It Mostly Works” Finish Line

Cost way more time and money than planned. Does it look pro? Absolutely not. You can see plywood edges if you look close. But you know what?

Got the kids and the neighbor to jump on it.

• The bounce? Yeah, it’s there now! Not soft like a mattress, but dives don’t feel like hitting concrete. Padding + Plywood + Wood = success (by accident!).
• The solid wood? Looks great on top, doesn’t slide around.
• My sanity? Frayed. But hey, it’s playable now.

Lesson learned? Sometimes the simplest, uglier fix under the hood gets the job done when the “right” stuff fails spectacularly. Won’t win any awards, but the ball gets volleyed. That’s enough for me. Next project? Probably napping.