Getting Started
So I finally caved and bought this rubber basketball engineer board kit online after weeks of staring at pickup game videos. Box showed up looking like it fought a bear during shipping. Ripped open the package and dumped everything on my garage floor – boards, bolts, weird rubber tiles, instruction manual thinner than my last paycheck. Classic “some assembly required” situation.
The Great Unboxing Mess
Swept away yesterday’s oil stains before laying out the wooden floor panels. Counted pieces three times because the diagram looked like toddler doodles. Pro tip: wear gloves handling those rubber edges – gave me paper cuts that stung like lemon juice. Separated all hardware into yogurt containers:
- Silver bolts
- Black washers
- Weird plastic clips
- Enough nuts to open a hardware store
Assembly Wars
Started connecting the wooden baseboards corner-to-corner. Dropped bolt #17 under the workbench, spent 15 minutes cursing and fishing it out with a magnet. Reality check: those “easy-lock” joints required me sitting on the boards while hammering. Neighbors probably thought I was building a bomb. Halfway through, realized two panels were swapped – had to unscrew everything like a dang Jenga tower. Sweat dripping on the manual turned it into papier-mâché.
Rubber Wrestling Match
Thought the rubber tiles would snap together easy. NOPE. Had to kneel on each one like praying to the basketball gods while forcing the seams. That engineered rubber smell? Like burnt tires mixed with cheap plastic. Watch out: they spring back when you cut them – almost took my eye out trimming the last piece. Used my whole body weight stomping them flat. Ended up using duct tape on the edges like a redneck solution.
Final Victory Dance
Bolted the engineer board onto the base – surprise extra holes didn’t match up! Drilled new ones, metal shavings everywhere. Stood back and admired the lopsided beauty. Took a test shot… ball bounced like it was on Mars. Verdict: Works, but won’t survive my nephew’s birthday party next week. Two hours my ass – this took all dang Saturday. Still, court’s done. Time to break out the cheap beer.
