Man, this pad dancing idea hit me after bashing my toes on concrete during a late-night Just Dance session. Needed something springy for my dance pad but didn’t wanna break the bank. Remembered that dusty stack of oak planks rotting in my garage – leftover from God knows when.

The Great Material Hunt

Dragged all the wood into the living room like a pack mule. Spread ’em out and groaned – half were warped worse than my grandma’s spine. Dug through my toolbox finding:

• The zombie hammer (handle taped up with duct tape)
• Rusty measuring tape that always snaps back at my fingers
• Three mismatched saws – one missing teeth

Realized I needed cushioning underneath. Ripped up an old yoga mat looking like chewed gum, layered it with some leftover carpet padding. Looked like a Frankenstein sandwich.

Sawdust Carnage

Started measuring my dance space – 6ft by 6ft. Drew lines on the planks with a kid’s crayon since my pencil vanished. First cut went sideways when the warped wood jammed the saw. Kicked the damn plank clear across the room. Felt good.

Whacked the planks together using the hammer handle like a battering ram. Splinters flew everywhere – my arms looked like I’d wrestled a cactus. Fit them in rows, tongue-and-groove style. Had to shove my full weight against the last row to close gaps. Stood there panting like I’d run a marathon.

Final Countdown

Sweat dripping, I plugged in the dance pad. Tried some basic steps – slid like butter! Jumped hard for testing… heard this terrifying CREAK. Froze like a statue. But the planks held. Did the full “Uptown Funk” routine without anything collapsing. Floor bounced just enough to save my knees.

Gaping gaps still show near the edges and it looks uglier than a dumpster fire, but hey – saved 200 bucks and learned why carpenters drink. Next project? Finding Band-Aids for these splinter wounds.