The Idea Hits

Woke up last Sunday eyeballing that pile of pine timber scraps behind my shed. Got this crazy picture in my head – could I make a mini basketball backboard thing? You know, the kind you mount on a wall? Started pacing around the garage scratching my beard. Why pine? Cause it’s cheap and I had it lying around already.

Measuring & Chopping Chaos

First grabbed my dusty tape measure. Decided 24×18 inches would work for the backboard. Marked the pine planks rough as hell with a carpenter pencil. Sawdust flew everywhere when I fired up the circular saw – cut four pieces to size but one came out crooked. Cursed, recut it, still slightly wonky. Whatever, character marks.

The Glue Nightmare

Slapped wood glue all over and clamped the planks together. Glue oozed out like snot, got all over my jeans. Wiped it with a rag, made it worse. Clamps weren’t tight enough – middle plank popped up overnight. Had to redo the whole glue-up next morning with twice as many clamps.

Mounting Madness

Drilled holes for the rim bracket while swearing at my cordless drill dying mid-job. Had to dig out my ancient corded drill. Bolted on this rusty rim I salvaged from my nephew’s old hoop. When I test-slammed a ball? The whole thing wobbled like jelly. Threw in extra L-brackets on the back yelling “STAY PUT YOU BASTARD!” Fixed it.

Finished Disaster Piece

Sanded it with 80-grit paper just enough to not give splinters. Left all the glue stains and uneven edges visible. Hung it on the garage wall with heavy-duty anchors. Shot some baskets – ball bounces like it’s on concrete but the rim holds. Would I do it again? Nope. Does it work? Somehow yes. Looks like a beaver built it, but makes me smile every time I airball a shot.