Alright, so I tackled that volleyball court flooring project last Thursday. Crazy how things played out, so figured I’d dump my notes here.

First Off, The Mess

Got called to the community center ’cause their court looked like a warzone. Splinters everywhere, floorboards popping up like zombies. Nobody could dive without risking tetanus. Manager handed me this janky toolbox that’s basically duct tape holding it together.

The Prep Work Disaster

Started clearing debris with this rusty crowbar – snapped halfway through. Had to run to the shed for my backup tools. Sweat dripping like a leaky faucet scraping glue residue. Found three roaches chillin’ under corner planks. Nice.

• Measuring the floor? Yeah right. Old blueprints were coffee-stained nonsense.
• Used sweat calculation instead: paced around cursing until distances felt “about right”.
• Dumped out these warped replacement boards smelling like grandma’s attic.

The Hammer Showdown

Tried nailing the first board – boom. Missed completely, smashed my thumb purple. Saw stars for two minutes straight. Third swing cracked the wood. Grabbed the rubber mallet instead and started whispering threats under my breath. Took forever getting them flush. Noticed too late one board had gnarly knot holes? Too tired to care.

Finishing Touches Chaos

Applied varnish like my life depended on it. Got so much fuzz in the coating it looks like a chia pet. Manager brought pizza while I was crawling to the exit – cheese grease now baked into court corner. Whatever, still playable. Kids tested it by belly-flopping. No splinters = mission accomplished.

Lessons? Buy better gloves. Never trust community center tool sheds. And sweat is actually decent measurement unit.